Eight

“Don’t worry about me mom, I’ll be perfect.” I finished my food and did the dishes. When it was time to leave for school, I called out to Janice, “be careful okay?”

She laughed. “I should be the one worrying about you. I’m your mother not the other way around.”

I smiled, “Still.”

“You always put others first,” She looked at me in a way that she used to look at my father. “You took that from him. It’s like he’s living through you.”

I fidgeted with my fingers. I felt so uncomfortable. I was never an emotional person. I preferred to lock up my feelings and put on a bright smile while secretly dying inside. I always felt like people would take advantage of me if they saw the real me. If they saw how really broken I was. “I’ll see you later.”

She nodded.

More than half an hour early I decided to head to my classroom rather than go hang out at the cafeteria were half of the student body was. I didn’t want anyone to see through me, I wasn’t sure I could hold a conversation long enough without anyone noticing that something was wrong.

I was sitting at the windowsill staring out of the window as the playgrounds filled with more students. I wasn’t thinking about anything specific. The smell of fresh rain made my head dizzy. It was a beautiful morning with the clouds covering the sky grey for as far as I could see. My hand shot out and as the droplets of rain hit my hand, my eyes closed. It felt so cold, so odd but yet the caress felt magical. I smiled; nothing and no one would get me down today.

My eyes opened as I felt the unease of being watched. I scanned the parking lot expectedly but no one seemed to be paying me any attention. The hairs on the back of my nape tickled and stood on edge. I sighed, I must be paranoid.

I slid down from the windowsill and stood on my feet still gazing out of the window and it was only then that I saw golden eyes staring at me from my peripheral view. My heart slowly crept to hyperventilation. I wasn’t sure where I’ve seen them before. It was as though the eyes were looking straight through me secretly breaking the walls I've managed to build all these years. I leaned forward to get a better view but the trees made it impossible for me to see what kind of creature the eyes belonged to.

There was a knock on my classroom door and I looked towards it, when I looked back at the forest there was nothing, I couldn’t see the eyes anymore. I laughed bitterly.

“I didn’t see you get in this morning.” It was Benjamin.

I forced a smile as I walked back to my desk. “I haven’t been here long.”

“I brought you some tea,” Benjamin always almost every day brought me a sizzling cup of coffee. Four sugars, no milk and two coffees.

I smiled in appreciation.

“So... When should I bring the contract?” He laughed nervously as he ran his hand over the back of his neck.

“You tricked me,” I answered blankly. "You probably heard from someone that Zack was home." I looked up at him through my lashes. "You aren't really a wizard are you?"

“You give me too much credit.”

“I didn’t sign up for this.”

“You haven’t signed yet...technically”

“That was taken out of context.”

He seemed satisfied.

The annoying squeal of the bell sounded. Benjamin called out that he’d see me at lunch as he ducked a few of my classmates who pushed past him in a hurry. The giggling girls were too happy and their laughter contagious. I found myself smiling as they chatted away.

When the final bell sounded the room fell silent. I sighed. Here goes my day.

At second break I walked to the library. It didn’t take long for Selma to convince me to try pizza from the cafeteria. I had it with diet soda.A couple of minutes later I heard Benjamin groan. I followed his hateful gaze to see Bradley as he strolled in confidently. His scent was refreshing and intoxicating as he walked past us to stand with his equally beautiful sister-in-law, Rebecca, by the window.

“Hey sis,” He said as he ruffled her hair.

I gasped as she smiled showing her perfect whites. They were too bright in contrast with her cerulean hair – a blue so dark I had to wonder if it was natural. She punched him playfully on the shoulder and he pretended to fall and caught himself on the desk next to him. “When did you get so strong?”

She pinched him.

When he spoke he sounded offended but he was smiling. “I brought you something to eat.”

I had to wonder why they were talking so loudly.

“Salt?” she mused. “I’m not sure fireworks are on S.C.A goals.”

I felt as though I was missing an inside joke as they laughed in unison. What did fireworks have to do with this? What was I missing? My curiosity burned through me.

The room had gone silent as we all watched mesmerised by these two angels behaving so human. They were a wonder. And their voices were mesmerizing as though they were somewhat singing instead of talking. My eyes followed every move they made. They were simply breath-taking.

He smiled. “Can’t I be nice to my sister without having an alternative motive?”

She gave him a knowing look.

“Okay fine,” He ran his hand through his hair and I groaned. He turned slowly still smiling to look at me. It was as though he could hear my thoughts. When his gaze met mine all traces of humour left his gorgeous face. When he spoke again it was through clenched teeth and a set jaw. He wasn’t looking at me anymore but I knew I was the reason for his sudden change of mood. “I’m going out tonight.”

She shook her head and her curls moved in sync.

“I’ll owe you one.”

“Why can’t you stay away from her?”

He laughed grimly. “She’s it.”

“No!” she bellowed excitedly. She swept a meaningful look at me briefly. “You owe me.” She said to Bradley.

I couldn’t bear to listen any longer. I was furious. I didn’t know why. I sat up knocking my chair down as I went. I couldn’t understand the ache in my heart.

“I shouldn’t have gone there. I should’ve spent my lunch here.” I said glumly as I closed the door to my classroom. I buried my face in my hands as I rocked my body to calm down.

The hours after that were a bit of a blur. The last period of the day came. It was the one class I was dreading to attend. I couldn’t help hoping he’d skip class today but to my disappointment he was one of the first few to come in. I don’t know why I was disappointed, luck tended to avoid me.

Sixty minutes felt like eternity. I couldn’t keep my eyes away from him as he sat there, his mind miles away. When school finally let out I sighed in relief and slammed down on my chair as I waited for the room to clear. I buried my face in my hands and cursed myself for being so stupid. My head was killing me. I groaned, what did I do? What have I gotten myself into?

“Are you okay?” a musical voice said.

I blinked. “Um…” was he talking to me? I pointed my index finger at myself unsure whether he really was talking to me and I swept a meaningful suspicious look around the room. Sure enough we were the only people left.

“You look angry.” He wasn’t looking at me with anger but curiosity as he studied me.

I stared. He waited patiently for my answer. It took me a full minute to finally whisper a stuttered response. “I’m f... fine.”

“You don’t look so good.” His voice was polite but his eyes remained resolutely cold. And I couldn't help but notice that when I spoke he seemed to scrunch up his nose and move swiftly back as though he couldn't stand my breath. I couldn't help my hand from covering my mouth and blowing some air to smell my breath. The scent of my favourite chewing gum still lingered in my mouth. I frowned. Confused. Maybe I could ask Janice if my breath stinks. Maybe I was immune to it.

“It’s just a headache.” I half lied.