Not Saying No

Cordia took a deep breath and tried to decide how to explain her feelings about marriage to this man who’d been her friend her entire life. “Jaris, I’m not saying ‘no.’ I’m just saying, I know you, and I know if there is any chance that you can go enlist in an army and fight for what you think is right that you will do it. You’ll do it in a heartbeat, regardless of what I think. And what if we had children? What if we had little ones left at home while you were off fighting? I just don’t think it’s a good idea right now.”

He spun to face her. “Cordia, what if we did?” he asked, his arms flailing out in exasperation. “That would be wonderful. You and your family could raise them for a little while. Heaven knows my mama would be there, more than you could ever wish to see her, at the idea of grandchildren. I’m not saying that if there is a war that I won’t go fight. But even if there is—and that’s a big if, in my opinion—it’s bound to be a short war. Everyone is saying so.”

She could not help but throw her head back in a sarcastic “Ha!” before continuing. “Yes, everyone is saying so. Everyone who wants good men such as yourself to enlist for the duration. This is an issue thousands of years old. I do not rightly think that it will be decided in a battle or two. It hasn’t been decided by old men deliberating and discussing it for over two hundred years. It sure won’t be decided by young men dying much faster.” The passion in her voice and the glint in her eye made him realize that this was something she had spent many hours thinking about. It was amazing for him to consider that a woman would put so much thought into issues like war and slavery. But then, Cordia Pike was no usual woman. And that is why he finally decided to let her have her way.

“All right, Cordia,” he began. “Just what do you believe we should do then?”

She had spun around at the end of her speech so violently she was shocked to hear him speaking so calmly. She put her parasol down, point resting on the ground, and turned to face him. She cleared her throat. “Well, I think that it would be in our best interest to wait until after the war. If there is a war,” she added, before he could even open his mouth to throw that idea in. “If they do get all of this decided peacefully, and South Carolina does not secede—which it will,” she commented quietly, more to herself, looking at the ground. She looked back up at him, “Then, we can plan an earlier wedding. But if there is a war--and I don’t see how there is anyway there won’t be—and you enlist, then I propose we wait until your safe return before we carry out our wedding plans.” She was looking him straight in the eye now and she could see that he was beginning to accept the fact that, though not under his most choice circumstances, she had, in fact, agreed to be his wife.

Jaris nodded. “Yes, ma’am,” he agreed, a smile beginning to grow across his face. After all, when you were asking someone like Cordia Pike—and there weren’t too many women like Cordia Pike in this world—to be your wife, you had better reckon on something not going directly as planned.

“Do not call me ma’am,” she said, eyes open wide, only half kidding. This was a little game they had been playing for about six years, ever since the day that Jaris realized he was infatuated with Cordia and wanted to marry her. He would call her ma’am because he knew that it irritated her. Eventually, he knew that she would hit him, which had been about the only way that Cordia Pike was likely to touch a member of the opposite sex. He would take what he could get.

He smiled at her and she could not help but smile back. “Oh, I almost forgot,” he said, digging around in the pocket of his jacket. He pulled out a small gold band with a very tiny diamond adornment. Cordia gasped. She had forgotten all about a ring. Likewise, she was surprised to see it included an actual diamond. “This belonged to my great-grandmother, Helen Teal Adams. My ma said it should belong to you because you are just as strikingly beautiful and just as prone to fits of reason as any woman she has ever known since.” Cordia’s eyebrows rose at these last comments. His mother thought that she was difficult. “Cordia,” he continued. “You shouldn’t be surprised that you have a reputation as a strong-willed woman. My ma meant it as a compliment. She will be extremely happy to hear that you have accepted my proposal.” He thought, but did not admit out loud, that his family would have a hard time accepting an indefinite date for a wedding. Cordia wasn’t so sure that calling her strong-willed was a compliment, but she stuck her hand out for him to take and he slipped the ring delicately onto her finger.

“Now it is official,” he said, proudly. “Someday, we will be married.”

She laughed and actually reached over and put her arms around him. “Jaris Adams, you are something else.”

“So are you, ma’am,” he said, turning to walk back toward her house where his horse was waiting.

“Don’t call me ma’am!”

“Sorry,” he started, but couldn’t help but add, “ma’am.”

Cordia balled up her fist and punched him in the side. He pretended that it hurt and doubled over in pain. “Help, my wife-to-be is beating me!” She laughed and pulled him back up.

“Stop it! People are going to start looking at us,” she said quietly.

Jaris spun in a circle. There was no one in sight. “There ain’t no one around, Miss Cordia. But don’t you already know that people can’t help but look at you, the prettiest girl in town.”

Cordia actually felt herself blushing. She’d never had a young man say anything quite like that to her before.

“But, I reckon you had better be careful about hitting me,” he continued. “You know, once you are my wife, I will be able to hit you with a stick, so long as it’s no wider than my thumb.” She knew he was teasing, and when he started to laugh that confirmed it. Still, the very idea that he would have control over her once they were married was a little alarming to her. He saw her eyes widen and stopped, turning her around to face him. “Cordia,” he said, no longer laughing and with a very serious look in his eyes, “I can promise you that I will love you until the day I die.”

She looked deeper into his eyes. Yes, she could see that. He would love her always, until the day he died. She did not know if she could say the same. “I know you will,” she admitted. And then, Jaris Adams did something he had wanted to do since he was 14 years old. He leaned over and kissed Miss Cordia Pike right on the lips.