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Chapter 3: Sawyer

(Earlier that day)

“I’m sorry Sawyer. If you want another chance at the drafts this is the only way. You need a fresh start with a new team.” Coach says to me again.

It’s his way of saying I royally screwed up here and he needs to throw his problem child to another coach to deal with. Well, I don’t give a shit where they send me because it won’t change anything. After college, I’ll be another washed up athlete. Sure, I recovered better than most, but I was still benched for another few months by my coach as a precaution. When I was allowed to play again, I had all this anger and resentment built up that I was laying it all on the ice.

I was considered to be a lethal player and not in a good way. Basically, I’ve been pissed at the world since I got injured and was marked as a waste of an investment by the recruits. They want unsullied players, and I wasn’t one of them anymore. So, coach spoke to one of his buddies who said they had success getting injured players back into the best shape and some have gone on to be drafted. According to coach, this is my last chance to redeem myself.

“Yeah, coach I got it.” I say less than enthusiastically.

Maybe I should never have come back but I wanted to prove to everyone that I could be just as good now as I was before. Better even. All I succeeded in doing was making myself even more of an outcast. My former teammates refuse to play with me anymore and have turned their back on me completely on and off the ice. Well, screw them! I don’t give a fuck about any of this anymore. So why do I stick around?

I still love hockey, and it feels like a part of me was taken away when I got hurt. Hockey is my life, and I was supposed to become a great athlete and sign a huge contract so that I could finally take care of my mom. She worked her ass of taking care of me and Zach growing up. I owe a lot to her, and I won’t go back on that promise. Sure, her new husband is a standup guy and makes her happy but she deserves more than a small house and a dead end job at the local flower shop.

Zach is well enough off to buy our old house which helped my mom out a lot but that was his way of paying her back and this is mine. She bought me my first skates and got me onto the local team. It was her hard work that got me my scholarship, and I blew it all up by being a complete idiot!

“Make the most of the situation son.” Coach says and I nod.

I know what he’s going to say next, but I’m done listening to his speeches and I have a plane to catch.

“Thanks coach. See you around.” I stand and walk out of his office without looking at a single guy in the locker room.

They aren’t my team anymore.

Now I have a whole other shit storm to face, and I’m still not sure why I decided to do this.

When Poppy told me Bryn was home and applying to colleges, I was excited. For some reason I had this hope she would come to my school, and I could finally fix the rift between us. I screwed up big time with her and the guilt has been eating at me for years, but I’ve been too big of a coward to face it all. It was easy to ignore because she wasn’t around and I was busy with hockey, but that was all an excuse. I still followed her on social media and kept up with all the work she did down in Ecuador. She looked so happy, and it killed me not to be able to go with her or even call her.

Then I got hurt and I pushed everyone away. She even called me to make sure I was okay, but I didn’t answer. What was I going to say to her? She would be another person I would have let down, and I didn’t want to hear the pity in her voice. Bryn had been my biggest supporter and I screwed that up! I hurt her and I should have grown a pair and apologized but I was a stupid kid. Then I became an asshole adult who only cared about himself.

Now I have nothing left and have no idea what to do with myself. So, when I grilled Poppy about where Bryn was going to be attending, I started my new mission. I am going to win my best friend back! So, when the coach gave me the list of schools, I could transfer to the one Bryn would be attending. Thankfully my coach knew the coach there and they were able to get me at the last minute.

A little more bribing and begging Poppy got me some more information about Bryn. Then there was sweet talking the student administration department and I was able to find out where Bryn would be staying. As if fate was making a way for me, I knew the boyfriend of her roommate. I called him up and basically told him that he needed to step things up with his girl and ask her to move in. He was on the fence about it for a while and finally gave in which left Bryn without a roommate. A position I was happy to fill.

Now I’m standing on the sidewalk looking at the shellshocked face of my best friend, and all I want to do is jog up to her and pull her into my arms. Only her shocked expression quickly morphs into her scary angry face that I know all too well.

“What are you doing here?” She growls before crossing her arms over her chest.

Okay…not the reaction I was hoping for but deserved.

“I’m your new roommate.” I say calmly.

She scoffs and picks up her boxes.

“What are you doing?” I ask when she pushes past me and heads back the beat-up car she’s had since she was sixteen.

“I’m not staying here with you. You…asshole!” She yells without even looking at me.

I have to bite back a smile because she never cussed before and it sounds sort of adorable.

“Wow, that hurts Bumble Bee! Tell me how you really feel.” I tease but she whirls around so fast that I jump forward to stop some of her stuff from falling to the ground.

“Don’t call me that! We are not friends any more, so you don’t get to use my nicknames.” She yells.

I hold my hands up in surrender and take a step back. “Fine. I won’t call you by any nicknames. But don’t go, okay? It’s late and I don’t want you sleeping in your car or something. The housing office is closed so there’s nothing you can do right now. Just come inside and stay tonight.”

She narrows her eyes at me. “Why should I stay in a house with a guy who used to call himself my best friend and then ghosted me for years. Years Sawyer! I mean what the heck?”

I cringe at the harsh truth of what I did to her. She has every right to be furious with me, but I’m not backing off. Out of all the mistakes I’ve made this was the worst. She was the only person in my life that saw every part of me. The good and bad that I tried not to show anyone else, and I tore her apart by throwing her aside.

“You have every right to be angry but-“

“Yeah, I do! I plan on milking this anger for a good long time too!”

God, I missed her. She has this way of being both sweet and sassy that makes her such a fun person to be around. I hogged her all to myself when we were growing up because I needed her, but I know she would have had so many friends.

“Okay, but why don’t you be angry and get a good nights sleep too?” I offer but she huffs.

I know what’s coming next. It’s like nothing about her has changed. Except for the fact that she’s drop dead gorgeous now. She’s always been pretty, but all that childhood cuteness has changed into this beauty that I can’t seem to wrap my head around. Seeing my childhood friend turn into a stunning woman is a head trip.

As I predicted she sets down her stuff and starts to pace while mumbling to herself. She used to do the same thing when we were kids, and she was furious at me. It was her way of having a full argument without blowing up on me. Even when she was angry, she tried to be a good person.

“Bryn.”

She holds a hand up to stop me and I let her continue her self-arguing. It goes on for several minutes until she finally stops and drops her head back. When she looks back at me, I see a war of emotions on her face. It’s like she wants to say no, but it’s me.

“Fine. But I will be looking for another place to stay tomorrow. I’m too tired to yell at you any more tonight. Now do you have the key?”

I pull the key out from my pocket and hold it up.

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