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Chapter

Chapter 6

Cameran -

I just sat there in her lap crying for quite a while.

A part of me wanted to feel awkward and embarrassed, but I mostly felt relief.

Finally the tears stopped flowing and she bounced me lightly in her lap.

Dani: ‘Do you think we could try to eat a little now?’

I slowly nodded and she wiped my face.

Dani: ‘I have a feeling you've been holding that in for quite a while.’

‘Yes Ma'am. I'm sorry I just let it go like that.’

Dani: ‘Don't be sorry, you needed it. You shouldn't keep that kind of stuff inside, it'll eat you alive. Speaking of eating, why don't we get started on dinner? We have the weekend to talk about whatever we need to, so let's relax.’

I nodded and she kissed the side of my head.

We stood up and she went to the seat across from me.

I expected there to be tension, but we just casually transitioned into a conversation.

It started with the cliche get to know you stuff and gradually advanced as we ate.

Dani: ‘So do you see your little as an extension of you or does she have her own identity?’

‘Mimi Ma'am.’

Dani: ‘And as a puppy?’

‘Eran.’

Dani: ‘Do you think I might be able to meet them this weekend? Would you be comfortable with that?’

‘I'm comfortable with it, but I don't know if it could happen. I haven't been able to let either of them out in quite a while, but maybe if I'm not alone I can.’

Dani: ‘Would there be anything I could do to help? I've know people to have triggers I guess you could call it. Things that would make it easier.’

‘Mimi really loves happy meals, well, nuggets in general and sweets. Maybe a few other foods. Certain movies or TV shows well sometimes help. I have to feel safe, for her to come out in a happy way, but there's been a few times she's come out because of how scared I was. I think it would be easier for you to meet Eran first. Eran doesn't really communicate much, and I think that would be less pressure, but there is a catch.’

Dani: ‘What would that be?’

‘When I'm in that head space I prefer being totally naked, but I don't know if I could relax enough to be in a headspace knowing you could see my scars.’

I shyly glanced across the table, then back down at my food.

Dani: ‘What if I saw the scars before you tried to get in the headspace so it wouldn't be anything new?’

‘I mean we can try, but I don't know if it would work.’

Dani: ‘I also have some pretty tight fitting tank tops if you think you might be able to wear one of those and a pair of panties that way you feel naked enough, but have the security of being covered.’

‘We can try. As nervous as I am, even just a few minutes of freedom would be great.’

Dani: ‘Ok. Tonight we'll negotiate and tomorrow we'll see what happens. I'm going to say right now though that until we know each other better and I believe that you are truly in a good place, I don't think that we should do any type of painful physical play.’

‘That sounds good to me.’

Dani: ‘I have a few ideas of things that might help also, but I'll leave a little mystery. What foods would be best for you?’

‘I love pepperonis and cheese for treats. I really don't like vegetables when I'm in that headspace, but I will eat potatoes sometimes. If I stay in the headspace long enough to where it really matters I can usually be persuaded to eat pizza rolls and sometimes pasta.’

Dani: ‘Ok. Well we've been done eating for over an hour. How about I order a bottle of champagne and we enjoy the hot tub? If you want to wear something to stay covered there's no pressure.’

‘I would rather you go ahead and see them, but I might cover up after.’

She just gave me a small nod and stood up extending her hand.

I took her hand and we walked inside to go to our bags.

She of course just started removing her clothes, but I went into the bathroom.

I took my clothes off and turned around to look in the mirror from behind.

I took a few deep breaths and put on my bikini bottoms and crossed my arms and walked out.

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