04

– So Igor, what do you work on? – My mother asked, directly and quickly.

– D. Betânia, I work... – he stopped when he saw my mother’s face. He looked at me confused and I wondered why he didn't look at Ceci, but I tried to let it go.

– She doesn’t like Bethany, if you want, call her Aunt Betty. Never Bethany. – I explained.

• Oh sorry.

• All good. – My mother smiled, looking more and more delighted.

– Well... I work at the planetarium in the city center, part time. From 10 to 6 and then I have college. But I'm on vacation and everything. I got the job because my aunt is an astronomer, she used to work there and found a job for me.

• Serious? Wow, that's great. Live with your parents?

– No... I have my own apartment.

• So young?

– When my grandfather died, I was 16 years old, he left me a lot of money. At that time, my parents had already emancipated me because… they thought I was mature enough. – I looked at him curiously, not knowing this detail about his family. He never talked about his parents, or anything similar. – The money was just enough to buy me a house and pay for my Astronomy college. With my job, I paid for a car for myself.

– You seem like a determined boy. Unlike my daughter, Maria de Lourdes.

– Malu, mother. My name is Malu. – I stirred my rice with my fork nervously, already anticipating disaster.

– I don’t know why you won’t let me call you by your real name, Maria de Lourdes. It's such a beautiful name.

– Please, mom. Malu, you know that. – I controlled the urge to grit my teeth and cross my arms in irritation. – You’ve gotten used to it.

– Malu is like that, the only thing he knows about life is that he hates his own name. – My mother commented addressing Igor. Okay, it's started, I thought. My mother was indignant because I didn't choose which college to go to and because I wasn't interested in any course, other than the English course that I had finished a while ago. It wasn't my fault that I hadn't discovered my calling yet, man. I didn't worry so much because I had time to think. And it wasn't my fault if no profession fit my current profile.

– Mom... I know what I’m going to do in life. Faculty.

– But you don’t know what.

– I have time to decide. We've already talked about this. – I looked at her, hoping she would realize that this was not the time to listen to her sermons. She looked back at Igor and smiled.

– Faculty of Astronomy? How different.

– Not so much… – he smiled and looked at me, I looked away. Angry with my mother, who drooled over Igor, with Cecília, for showing him off so proudly, with Karol, for looking sweetly at him and being receptive. Anger at me for... For so many things! And anger at him, mainly and entirely at him. I felt hatred boiling inside me, mixed with the whirlwind of feelings and thoughts that was my head. My stomach was churning and finishing my mother's mayonnaise salad became impossible. – I really like stars.

– You could take me to the planetarium. – Karol intervened in the conversation; ignoring the tense atmosphere between me and my mother like a typical 5 year old, trying to get rid of the vegetables. – I like stars too.

– We could all go, who knows… – he smiled at Karol, charismatic. I rolled my eyes, drinking a glass of soda and trying my best not to look in that direction, or simply stick a fork in my forehead. Nobody realized how unpleasant this was. What the hell!

• Look great. How about tomorrow?

• Not tomorrow. – Unable to contain myself, I opened my mouth. I cursed under my breath when everyone looked at me. Unfortunately, my mother came with the most difficult question:

• Why? – I searched my mind for some good excuse. Unfortunately I was a terrible liar.

– Well... It's just... I'm going out. – I smiled, proud of my big apology.

– To the beach? – Ceci stepped in and looked at me with a sarcastic look. – You go to the beach every day.

– I'm not going to the beach tomorrow. I'm going somewhere else.

– What other place? As far as I know, all her ‘friends’ traveled and Alexandre did too.

– I don’t just know them. – I couldn't lie, so I just kept doing these evasions.

• You are going. – My mother said smiling, but I knew she would be threatened later. I gave her a nice frown, which she placidly ignored.

– We can go another day. – Igor tried to calm things down. I looked at Igor trying to understand what his problem was. – There’s no problem there.

• After tomorrow! – Ceci said excitedly. I felt like disappearing. I didn't answer anything, and they started talking again. Subject? Beach. I? Martyrdom.

– What do you do in good time?

– Huh... I surf.

• Surfing?

– They start.

– Do you surf to stay in shape?

– No. Not really. When I started surfing I was very skinny and I hated the gym, I always found it boring. But I liked sports a little, but I wasn't very good at it. But I love the sea, I found the perfect solution. I learned to surf. Keeping fit is just a bonus.

– You must have a lot of girls all over you.

• No no.

– As there are liars in this world, you see... – I said softly. A few pairs of eyes turned to me.

– Did you say something?

• No of course not! – I blushed and he smiled sadly. The conversation returned, my mother seemed definitely won over. I was already tired of it. I woke up.

• Excuse me. I am going to sleep.

• Already? But we're going to watch a movie.

– I rented a beautiful novel, daughter. You would love it. – he laughs ironically. I didn't like romance, only when I felt like crying. And even more so, watch the film with these two? There were too many jokes for one night alone.