I need to forget about everything.

Sadie’s pov

I sat in silence, surrounded by the four walls of the restroom, but the noise inside my head was deafening. The feeling of love I once cherished had turned into a deep ache, stronger than any desire I had to listen to reason. My mum’s voice echoed through the door, pleading with me to open up, and I could hear Daisy, my best friend, shouting from the hallway, trying to snap me out of the darkness I had fallen into. But I didn’t want to listen. I didn’t want to be found. All I craved was for the world to leave me alone.

The door finally gave way after my mom and Daisy rushed out, and invited the security men to force it to open. Maybe they thought I’d done something drastic, that my silence meant I was thinking of ending it all. But when they found me, all they saw was a woman drenched in bitterness, pain, and tears. My mum rushed over to me, pulling me into her arms. She held me tightly, her own tears on the verge of falling, but she swallowed them down, trying to stay strong for me.

I could feel her heart beating through her chest as she rocked me like a child. But no matter how much she tried, the pain didn’t go away. I couldn’t hold it in any longer.

“Where do I go from here, Mum? He meant everything to me,” I sobbed. “Why is it that the men I love never love me back?”

I desperately needed an answer, but my mum didn’t rush to say anything. She just sat beside me, her hand moving gently up and down my back, waiting for my storm of tears to pass. After a long pause, she finally spoke, her voice soft and soothing.

“It wasn’t your fault, Sadie, that Leo didn’t love you back…”

“Then whose fault was it?” I cut her off, my face wet with tears.

“Sometimes, people just won’t love you the way you love them,” she said, still calm. “And sometimes, people aren’t meant to stay in your life forever. When they leave, it makes you stronger, helps you see things differently…”

“I hate the difference,” I spat, not letting her finish. I had imagined Leo and me as a perfect couple, a forever kind of love. And he didn’t just break my heart quietly—he shattered it in front of the whole world.

I stayed in that bathroom, not wanting to face anyone. Not until the hall was quiet, and I knew I wouldn’t have to see anyone’s pity-filled faces. My mum and Daisy were waiting for me when I finally stepped out, treating me like someone who had just lost everything. In some ways, I had. Mum was insisting we take a picture before we left. She said it would help me remember this moment, as if I needed any help remembering the worst day of my life. So we took the picture, just the three of us—me, my mum, and Daisy.

They tried to make me smile, but how could I? How could I smile when my heart felt like it had been ripped apart?

That’s how I ended up, heartbroken and abandoned, while Leo moved on without a care in the world. It was like something out of a bad movie, but it was my reality now.

The next hurdle I had to face was everyone’s pity. In my small neighborhood, people knew Leo—he was good-looking and charming. When he came to visit, he always smiled, and people saw us as the perfect couple. But by the next day, everyone had heard about the breakup. Some even saw it happen on live television, when Leo stood on stage and dedicated his award to her—Tasha. He kissed her in front of everyone, making it clear to the whole world that I was no longer part of his life.

When people saw me in the days that followed, they’d try to comfort me, but their words only made it worse.

“We saw what happened, Sadie. How are you holding up?”

I’d force a smile, lying through my teeth,

“I’ve moved on. Loving myself was the best decision I ever made. Leo and I just weren’t meant to be. It’s no big deal. It happens. I’m not the first person to go through something like this.”

I’d nod as if I believed my own words, then quickly walk away. But once I was alone, back in my room, I’d break down again. The tears would come, and the pain would flood back, fresh as ever. It felt like Leo had just walked out on me all over again. His words popped in my head:

“I didn’t want to hurt you… You’re my weakness, and I can’t keep this going anymore.”

I wished he’d never said those words. Or that he could take them back. Every night, I’d catch myself checking my phone, hoping for a message from him, some small sign that he still thought of me. But there was nothing. And every time I thought about him and Tasha, I’d wonder,

“What does she have that I don’t? What makes her better than me?”

They were probably cuddled up together right now, in the place where I should’ve been, on the night I had planned to spend with him. We were supposed to celebrate his award together. I had pictured us laughing, kissing, wrapped up in each other. Instead, he was with someone else, and I was here, alone, heartbroken, unable to eat or sleep.

Mum would knock on my door, and I’d ignore her. Then she’d call Daisy, and I’d hear their conversation through the walls.

“Hi, Daisy. Sadie’s locked herself in again. She won’t stop crying.”

Minutes later, my phone would ring. It was Daisy, trying to pull me out of the hole I’d dug myself into.

“Sadie, you’ve got to stop doing this to yourself. It’s been weeks. You need to start moving on.”

“I’m fine,” I’d say, even though my voice cracked. “I just need some space.”

“No, you’re not fine. You need people around you. Your mum is worried sick. Why keep hurting yourself like this? Leo doesn’t care about you anymore, so why are you still holding on? You’re a beautiful woman, and you deserve better. Soon, you’ll meet someone who will love you the way you deserve to be loved.”

Out of all the things Daisy said, one line stuck with me: You need to do something practical to help yourself.

I didn’t know what that meant at first. What could I do to heal this heartbreak? If Daisy lived closer, she would have come over every day to pull me out of my misery. But she didn’t, and I was left alone with my thoughts.

After days of reflection, I found myself thinking that maybe Leo was just too young, too immature to handle a serious relationship. Maybe an older man would’ve stayed, fought for us. The thought planted a dangerous idea in my mind: a fling, something purely physical to help me forget the pain, even if just for a little while.

I spent days thinking about it, and eventually, I decided to download a dating app. Not just any app, but one that connected people for blind encounters. No names, no faces. Just sex, then nothing. It seemed like the perfect solution.

I filled in my details—well, not my details. Everything was fake, except my phone number. I described the type of man I wanted: tall, muscular, with a deep voice. Someone I could feel, not see. And when it asked for the man’s age, I hesitated. I didn’t want another young man. I wanted someone older, someone who wouldn’t remind me of Leo. So, I doubled my age on the form.

A few hours later, I got a text. I had been matched with someone. The date was set for Saturday night. That gave me two days to get ready. My nerves were all over the place, but strangely, thinking about this blind date took my mind off Leo. I was nervous, yes, but in a way, it felt like I was starting something new, like I had something to look forward to again.

Saturday came, and I dressed in a short red gown. I sprayed on a new fragrance, something expensive, something I hoped he’d remember, even though we’d never see each other’s faces. As I was finishing my makeup, Mum walked into my room.

“Where are you off to?” she asked, her eyebrows raised.

“I’m going to a party,” I said, keeping it vague. “I need to forget about everything.”

She paused for a moment, then smiled softly. “Good luck,” she said, and closed the door behind her.

I took a deep breath and headed to the hotel. All I could think about was what this stranger would be like, and whether a night with him would finally help me move on.