4
I expected chaos—loud voices, hurried footsteps, the bustle of the pack preparing for a grand event—but the pack house is eerily silent as I step out of my bedroom. The stillness gives me chills. It seems every member of this pack is as obedient as they come, adhering to their Alpha’s every command.
Nothing will be postponed today. I think with a bitterness that settles in my chest.
Nora remains a step behind me, her presence a constant guide as we walk from the pack house and into the woods. At first, I feel little more than a quiet tension, but the deeper we go, the more my nerves heighten. The trees grow denser, and soon enough, I can see Alpha Fenrir’s imposing figure emerging in the distance, framed by the space between the trunks.
My legs falter for a split second.
The sun rises.
It’s about time.
"Stand tall, chin up, shoulders back," Nora whispers, quickly adjusting my posture as if my spine could bend like clay.
I nod faintly, keeping my eyes forward, forcing myself to step with steady, unwavering movements beneath the gaze of curious eyes. As Nora instructed, the male wolves stare at my bare skin without a flicker of hesitation, while the female wolves either regard me with awe or simmering jealousy.
“See? Such a small change in my choice of clothes, and this is the difference it brings,” Nora says, her voice carrying a note of pride.
But I know it’s not the dress that holds their attention. It’s the fact that their beloved Alpha is choosing me. Nothing more, nothing less.
The pack parts like the Red Sea, creating a clear path for me to walk through, leading me straight to a towering freestanding stone building. Massive stone pillars support a heavy stone slab, marking the entrance. Green moss crawls up the side of the crumbling structure, and intricate designs once visible on the stone have long since faded with age, leaving behind a ghost of what was.
"This place has stood for almost four hundred years," Nora says softly, her voice reverberating slightly in the stone structure as she stops walking.
I understand that I have to go inside alone, and my feet drag with hesitation as I slowly climb the large steps. The rough stone digs into the soles of my bare feet, making each step hurt more than the last.
Despite the dimness of the mid-morning sky, the interior of the building offers little light. The only clear sight is at the far end, where the ceiling has a large square gap, held up by four enormous stone pillars. At the center of the space, a slab of rock lies beneath the open sky, and Alpha Fenrir stands next to it.
"Come," he commands, his voice carrying a weight that forces me forward.
In my mind, I thought I would feel less terrified now that I'm face to face with him, but I don't. Instead, an overwhelming fear courses through me, but I know I cannot anger him in this sacred place for his pack. With that realization, I quickly suppress my fear, just as I’ve done all my life, and hurry toward him.
Hesitantly, I extend my trembling hand, and his colossal palm envelops mine. He pulls me toward him, and my heart beats so loud it feels as if it might burst from my chest. I stiffen, lifting my gaze to the sky above, attempting to push my anxiety down.
The warmth of Fenrir’s body seeps into my cold skin as he closes the distance between us. One deep breath, and our chests press together. His towering presence fills my vision, and I finally allow myself to see his face clearly. In the dining room, I was so afraid of my parents that I never looked directly at him.
Alpha Fenrir is the most handsome man I’ve ever seen. His thick, black hair falls naturally around his sharp jawline, accentuating his strong features. His gray eyes meet mine, and for a moment, I swear I see a million reflections of myself in them. The intensity of his gaze sends a burning sensation through my veins, heating my blood.
I immediately lower my head, avoiding his eyes, my body trembling with a combination of fear and desire I can’t control.
"The more you resist, the more pain it will bring," Fenrir warns in a softer voice, one that feels eerily familiar, like he can read my thoughts.
My palms are drenched in sweat, and I can’t stop the shivers that run down my spine. I nod mutely, unable to form words as they catch in my throat.
Fenrir reaches up to brush my perfectly curled hair behind my shoulder. His rough fingers graze the sensitive skin of my jaw, tilting my head upward. I can’t move, knowing what he expects from me, but also knowing that I am powerless in this situation.
"You are mine now," he murmurs, his voice low, and final.
Those are the last words I hear before his sharp canines sink into the crook of my neck, breaking the skin with brutal force. At first, the pain isn’t unbearable, only what I expected. I try to relax, to surrender to what is happening, but then the pain deepens, quickly becoming something far worse.
It’s as if a match has been lit inside my mind, and it spreads like fire. My body feels as though it’s being scorched from the inside out. My skull throbs with electric pulses, each one more agonizing than the last. The pain intensifies, leaving me gasping for air, unable to move or scream.
Through the agony, I hear Fenrir’s low growl reverberating off the stone walls, his presence both comforting and suffocating.
The pain becomes unbearable, a force that seems to tear at my very soul. My body trembles violently under the force of it, and soon my legs give way. I collapse to my knees, the torture still coursing through me as everything around me falls into a deathly silence.
Then, just as suddenly, I feel Fenrir’s warmth again, his strong arms pulling me close. He gently lowers me to the ground, cradling me as if I were fragile, though I feel nothing but emptiness inside.
"The union has been accepted."
Those words burn into my memory, dragging me from the darkness. I’m not sure how long I’ve been unconscious, but I can feel the lingering effects of the pain that knocked me out. It's not the first time my body has failed me in this way, though this is the first time the agony has come from my mind rather than my body.
I blink hard to open my heavy eyelids, the weight of them almost too much to bear. As I focus, I realize there’s a sharp, pulsing ache within my skull. It’s bearable, so I push myself off the stone slab slowly, cautious not to let dizziness take over again.
"Do you have any idea what you did?" Alpha Fenrir’s voice cuts through the silence, sharp and filled with anger.
I lower my aching eyes, avoiding his gaze as I brush the tiny stones from my palms. My fingers tremble, but I force myself to focus on the task at hand. I know I need to show some kind of remorse, something that will satisfy him. My father always hated it when I didn't take the blame, even when it wasn’t mine to take. It made him feel like he had failed, even when he hadn’t.
"I didn’t mean to," I whisper hoarsely, my throat raw from the scream I couldn’t control.
Fenrir turns away from me briefly, as if the sight of me infuriates him. I don’t understand why he’s so angry, but I know that it must have something to do with the fact that I blocked him out—his mind, his control, everything. For someone as powerful as Fenrir, that must be maddening.
A brief silence hangs between us, heavy and tense, before I feel the unmistakable burn on my shoulder where Fenrir bit me. A searing sensation fills the mark, and I can’t help the whimper that escapes me as my hand flies to my neck, instinctively trying to soothe the pain.
Thankfully, the pain fades quickly, leaving behind only a dull throb. I take a shuddering breath, trying to gather my composure.
"They accept you," Fenrir’s voice finally breaks the silence again, softer but with an edge of something I can’t place.
His words catch my attention, pulling me from my thoughts.
I know who ‘they’ are. I understand the steps of the ritual, thanks to Nora's endless questions and speeches.
First, the ancestors must accept me as part of Alpha Fenrir's pack. Then Fenrir himself will look at my naked body and accept me, and finally, all the pack members will determine if I’m worthy of their Alpha. It’s a full circle of submission. Nora said if everything goes as planned, as sunset approaches, Fenrir will take me to a chosen spot to finalize the mating ritual—through sex. Like it or not, I have no choice but to endure the process.
I can't help but take a step back, my feet inching away from the stone beneath me. A mile wouldn’t be enough distance to escape Fenrir.
His rough hands grip my shoulders with a firm yet gentle touch. I freeze, my body rigid with instinct. His eyes burn into my skull, the weight of his gaze pressing against me. Fenrir is patient, but there’s no mistaking the dominance behind it—he won’t let me escape. A flicker of fear rises within me, knowing how easily he could overpower me if angered. I don’t want to disobey him, but at the same time, everything within me fights against giving him what he wants.
It’ll be easier if you give him what he wants. Nora’s words echo in my head, unsettling me further.
I feel it in Fenrir’s posture, the unspoken command that threatens to snap me into place. I don’t need to look up to know that he’s glaring down at me, a silent warning to comply.
I rise slowly from the stone, hesitant. Fenrir steps back just enough to give me space to undress. The lemon-yellow fabric rustles as I begin to peel it from my body, the soft sound of the jingling jewels soothing me slightly. The sun shines through the opening above, casting light across the fabric, making the sequins glimmer.
As I untie the fabric from my chest, it falls from my back, forcing me to clutch the front to my chest. Instinctively, I turn away, not wanting him to see me in such a vulnerable state.
But turning my back to Fenrir is a mistake. It’s a big one.
The moment I do it, I feel a wave of regret. Turning my back to him is disrespectful, an Alpha's prerogative. The weight of his authority presses on my shoulders, and I realize how foolish I’ve been to act out of instinct.
He doesn’t scold me, though. Instead, his voice, low and steady, breaks the silence.
"After tonight, you are free on this land as you wish."
His words surprise me. I thought he would be angry, especially after I turned my back to him. But instead, he seems unfazed—patient, even.
Is it because he understands that me covering myself isn’t a sign of resistance but of self-preservation? Or is it simply because wolves have no shame when it comes to nudity?
Maybe it’s just normal for a wolf to be naked in front of their mate.
Even though I’m a wolf myself, I haven’t shifted much over the past four years. My parents forbade me from learning anything about my wolf side, and I’ve only shifted a handful of times, each with more difficulty than the last. I’m more human than wolf at this point, knowing little of what it means to truly embrace my nature.
I finish undressing slowly, at my own pace, without any signs of irritation or anger from Fenrir. He watches quietly, his patience almost unnerving.
When I glance up, his eyes are on me—bold, unwavering. My body is covered in bruises and scars, evidence of a life I’ve endured. Yet there’s no disgust in his gaze, no repulsion at the marks I carry.
He doesn’t hate me.
A warmth spreads through my chest, something strange and electric. It doesn’t last long, just a fleeting moment, but it’s enough to make me pause. I let out a breath I didn’t realize I was holding.
Finally, Fenrir allows me to get dressed again. He helps me tie the fabric at the center of my back, his rough fingers brushing against my skin.
"Come," he says, his voice softer now, though still commanding.
I nod quietly, my thoughts swirling, but my feet move forward, following him.