Chapter 8 : Trapped or Chosen

"Why do you care?" Amelia snapped, still running on adrenaline from her interaction with Julian just minutes ago.

"Did you kiss him?" Lucas demanded, eyes stormier than usual. His jaw worked as he gritted his teeth.

"I don't see how any of this is your business. You hardly had anything to do with me before my father was killed. Suddenly, you want an inside look at my nonexistent love life? I don't think so," Amelia shot back. She tried to turn, but she was fully boxed in by him.

"Listen to me," Lucas begged, tone suddenly desperate.

It sounded like someone else coming from him. His usual confidence was shattered, and in its place was a desperate, wounded animal. Amelia's heart pounded, the sound of his voice difficult to hear over her pulse pounding in her ears.

"What?" she breathed, barely above a whisper.

"It's just..." Lucas dropped his hands, using one to run through his hair. His eyes softened. "Why didn't you pick me at the council meeting this morning? I feel like as your Beta, it makes the most sense. What else is there to consider?"

Oh. That. He was right, it did make the most sense to choose him. Still, it all seemed so sudden.

"Lucas, I barely know you," Amelia tried to remind him.

"We have our whole lives to get to know each other, Amelia," he started. He must have realized how frantic he sounded because he took a deep breath before continuing in a much more controlled tone. "I know you've probably always just seen me as your father's Beta, but it's so much more than that for me."

Amelia furrowed her brow, trying to comprehend what he meant by that.

"I don't understand."

"I think there's something deeper here." Lucas studied her face, clearly searching for some signal she might be willing to take a chance on what he was saying.

"The Goddess chooses our mates. Whatever the council decides is what I'll accept as fate," she explained, hoping this was some kind of salve. "I'm not discounting you. I just need time."

"Then, tell me why I know you're my mate. I know, I know, you haven't shifted yet, so maybe you can't feel it yet, but trust me, I can. We're supposed to be together. Do you think it's just chance that we've ended up in this situation? This is fate, Amelia, you are my destiny," Lucas explained zealously.

Her eyes searched his face for any hint that this might be a joke. Was he out of his mind? While she wouldn't deny that he hadn't left her mind since the night her father died, he wasn't exactly alone in her thoughts.

Nathan and Julian, however infuriating and confusing that might be, were right alongside him in all of her considerations. Sometimes they weren't wearing any clothes, and she was in the middle of them ...

Amelia shook her head to clear her thoughts. Now wasn't the time for silly daydreams. Lucas mistook the shake of her head for all-out rejection, and she had to stop him from leaving.

"Wait. I need you to trust me on this," she pleaded.

"No, I need you to trust me," Lucas insisted. "I just know you will feel it too. You shift in what, like three weeks? Let me help you. And then you'll feel it. You'll know you and I were always supposed to end up together."

"This feels like it's all coming out of left field. We've shared maybe a handful of conversations my entire life, and now you're proposing marriage?" Amelia was trying to get him to understand how strange this was all coming across, but he clearly didn't see it that way.

"I know. I know, it seems sudden. But, here's the deep, dark, embarrassing truth of it all. I've always loved you. From the moment I saw you, I knew you were the one for me. I've had a crush on you since we were kids. I know you have no idea how special you are, but I could show you. Please, Amelia," he begged.

Amelia swallowed hard. Something stirred in her chest at his words. Was this working, was he charming her? She couldn't think straight. There was a dangerous mix of pheromones and endorphins in her system, her pulse still racing between this conversation and sparring with Julian.

Wasn't that the damndest thing? As soon as she tried to sort things with one of them, here came another to confuse her. She was thinking of Lucas, feeling guilty when she kissed Nathan. Now she was debating Lucas, brain still scrambled from Julian.

"Things are all still so … complicated," she tried to placate. "My world has been flipped on its head the past three days. I don't know if it's possible to make a decision with my head on straight right now."

"You think you're the only one?" Lucas demanded frustratedly.

Amelia realized she was being selfish. She lost her father, but the pack lost its Alpha. And now, she was forced to step into the role, completely unsure of anything in life. It wasn't supposed to happen this way. She was supposed to have more time to prepare.

"I know, I'm just not as quick on my feet as you are. I'm still processing everything." It was all she could promise. It was an explanation or an excuse, she wasn't sure which. She was trying her best, and this was one last thing, one more burden, that threatened to break her.

"How long do you need?" he asked softly.

Amelia shook her head, at him this time. She couldn't have an answer for him. How was she supposed to know? As he had already mentioned, she hadn't even shifted yet. That was looming over her like an ax on a rope, something else to change the world around her.

Maybe then she would be more in touch with what the Goddess intended, but for now, she was drowning in choices. She deliberately set aside the decision about who her mate should be. She wasn't ready to choose.

Her father's murderers were still on the loose. Revenge was at the forefront of her mind at all times, and she couldn't stomach dealing with much else.

It must have been the Goddess that finally moved her feet from where they were rooted. She marched out of the training center and left Lucas to stand and consider what he'd said. She wasn't exactly angry at him, she was just overwhelmed. He had to see how impossible this situation was for her.

The day was beautiful. She shouldn't be surprised. Her stomping footsteps left little dust clouds behind her though. Like the dry ground, she needed relief from the constant heat she was living in.

The Main was mostly empty. It wasn't surprising. It was a weekday, and people were getting on about their lives. The world still turned, work still had to be done, and bills still had to be paid, even as her life seemed to grind to a halt.

Her footsteps seemed cacophonous in the hollow building. She marched to her room, determined to lock herself away and mope until her next meeting. She wasn't some pawn for power. Was that what this was really about? She had almost worked herself up into a fury when she turned the corner to her room and found Lucas standing there.

Damn, the man was quick.

He was the resident strategist. He knew all the ins and outs of the compound. She should’ve known he would have some optimized route to anywhere within the compound.

Amelia started to read the man the riot act for following her, but he held up a hand.

"I think I came on a little strong. I wanted to apologize. You asked for time, and I wasn't very respectful of that. I'm sorry," he said.

He was leaning against her door, so she couldn't exactly ignore him. Once again, she found herself debating on how to respond to him.

"You're right. You weren't respectful of that at all. I need space, Lucas. Time, and space. Consider me Apollo 13." She made her best attempt at a joke, but it seemed to fall flat.

"Well, Apollo, can we start this whole conversation over? On a different day, perhaps?" he suggested.

Amelia felt her feet carry her closer. Damn the Goddess, if she was the one making her feet move, she was a fucking traitor. Still, she couldn't deny the draw she felt to Lucas, the same draw she had felt when she kissed Nathan here just the night before. It was the same draw that made her seek out Julian, no matter how sure she was that she hated his guts.

"I'll take that into consideration. Maybe next time, let me bring it up? I promise not to leave you hanging forever," she assured him.

"I'd like that," Lucas agreed.

Still, she was leaning closer to him, drawn to him like gravity. His eyes turned soft, his mouth offering her a sad smile. Guilt might be swallowing her whole because this was playing out as a sad mirror to her kiss with Nathan, but suddenly she couldn't let Lucas go without knowing what it was like to kiss him too.

He shifted against her door, and she realized she was being a fool. She shouldn't kiss him just because she felt some supernatural pull. That was silly nonsense. She pushed the door open and slipped past him.

Lucas caught her by the forearm, whirling her on her heels to face him. He pulled her face to his, kissing her with a surprising amount of passion. His lips crashed to hers, waves coming to shore. His teeth grazed her bottom lip, lighting a fire along all of her nerves.

Amelia kissed him back, her hands starting to roam his body. Firm, toned muscle met her clutching palms, turning her molten. She shouldn't indulge him, shouldn't encourage whatever this madness was. But, at that moment, she was mad for him, overcome with attraction or lust, or something otherworldly.

He planted a trail of kisses along her jaw, down her throat, drawing a gasp from her. Amelia's hands found their way under his shirt, nails dragging down the ridges of his abs.

She stepped away from him, breaking the kiss in a heartbeat. She stepped into her bedroom and closed the door in his bewildered face, leaving him to sort himself in the hallway alone.

Had she lost her ever-loving mind? That was the only explanation for the animalistic way she kissed him in the hall. She never even had a real boyfriend. Her first kiss had been Joey Maxwell when she was seven, and there had only been a handful of boys brave enough to try to kiss her since then. Being the Alpha's daughter hadn't exactly made dating easy.

But that? That wasn't just a kiss. This wasn't some boy trying to take her to the graduation dance as they celebrated finishing their formal schooling. That was a thirsty, fiery kiss. It was nothing like the sweet, flirty kiss she shared with Nathan. It was similar to the tension between Julian and her but in a category of its own.

What the hell was happening to her?