Chapter 6

Messiah Jordy

"Mate..." I could swear I heard the sound of a wolf's cry in my ears almost as loud as I heard Axl's second cry that evening.

Emphasis on the word, "second". I turned sharply to find a man standing behind us. His fierce eyes pierced into mine, as though he had just heard the same voice as I heard.

Could he be...?

I turned to look at Jamal, then returned my gaze to the man. I was standing between my two mates. While the first one, my bestfriend, had so coldly rejected me and said he wanted nothing to do with me, the second man stared down at me like a I was a ghost, a freak.

But was he wrong?

I was a girl who couldn't admit she was a girl, so I had the world think that I was a boy.

The goddess had blessed me, a girl, with a male wolf. And now, my best friend who I was mated to believed our bond to be a taboo. Then I was mated to a strange man who looked almost twice as big as a regular alpha wolf who also thought I was a freak because he believed me to be a man as well.

What sort of twisted fate was this?

No. I shook my head vehemently and started to take slow steps backwards. I was going away from the atmosphere, away from the both of them. I was confused and frustrated. All I wanted to do was fall to the ground and cry, and I couldn't even do that because I was a freaking alpha and I needed to be strong!

I turned my backs to both of them and ran into the forest. I ran as fast as my feet could carry me, while I allowed the wind to kiss my tears away.

The burden in my chest was pulling my head and the rest of my shoulders. With everyday that passed, it became harder and harder to keep my charade going.

How long did I have to continue living like this? Everyone in my pack, except my mother and father, believed me to be a boy. For how long would I continue to lie to them? What would happen when I was ready to marry? Would my parents expect me to marry a woman just to keep our secret safe? Even though I married a woman, was is still safe?

I shook my head as I ran back into the party. I placed my hands on my knees and looked down at the floor as I struggled to catch my breath. If there was anything I was grateful for today, it was the fact that I had turned twenty. Therefore, I had every right to seek answers to the numerous questions that flooded my mind in alcohol.

When I could draw in steady breaths, I raised my head up and started to walk. I made sure I mixed up in the crowd as I started my hunt for any and every alcoholic drink I could find.

I wanted to get wasted. I needed to get wasted.

I soon found a table in the center of the dance floor. About ten small cups were arranged on the table with the same colorless liquid inside them all. I picked one of the cups and pulled it close to my nose. The pungent smell of ethanol greeted my nostrils and I smiled to myself.

It was exactly what I had been searching for - it did not matter that I did not know exactly what it was.

I gulped down the harsh liquid. Both my eyes, tongue and throat were simultaneously set on fire. I closed my eyes and parted my lips open, trying to suck in air to aid my burning tongue and throat. I enjoyed the distraction the burn in my chest gave me, I wanted more of it.

I took another glass, then another glass followed. Three glasses followed the second, and another three glassess accompanied the fifth. Before I knew it, the music in the garden sounded distant and it felt as though I was walking on the cloud, somewhere in the heavens.

I chuckled and looked around. There were people all around me, yet not one single person had eyes on me, or had noticed me. I wanted to keep it that way. And with the way I was feeling, I had a deep sense it would not be possible. If I continued to stand amongst the crowd in my current state, I was bound to cause a scene.

I turned my head in the direction of the forest again. I struggled to stand straight and started my journey, staggering all the way. I was going to find a quiet place to hide, get naked and sleep in peace. I was going to be away from people, away from the burden I had to carry and the secrets I had to keep.

It was my secret hideout in the bushes..

.*****

I thought back to the present, where I was standing at the gates of my father's palace, drawing in deep breaths.

All the events that happened throughout last night had led to this very moment, the moment I pushed past the palace gates and ran into the palace with tears in my eyes.

A lot of things had been made clear to me in just a few hours; I didn't have the kind of friends I thought I did, and Jamal...

For rejecting me without reason, without wanting to sit and talk like we had known each other for a long time, it became clear to me that he did not care about me as much as I had thought he had, and it hurt me.

And as for the stranger in my hideout, I hoped to the goddess that he woke up with a wiped memory, a mind as fresh as clean slate. I hoped he would not remember a single thing, not even how he had gotten there, because if he did - if he discovered who I really was, and told a single soul about it - my entire family would be doomed. And it will be all my fault.

The thought sent shivers down my spine as I ran up the stairs, into my room. I couldn't bear the thought, at all.